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No D-Day.

(Read George's post on The Bad Blog to see what the deal is, but I'm not talking about it today.  Nope.  Don't want to.  Taking the day off.)

No D Day.  Not today.

In the theme of not writing about mumble mumble today, I was talking with my coworker about what I'd like to write about instead of mumble mumble.  Like what did I used to write when I was younger, and before the last four years had become focused on a certain health-related theme?

I wrote my first poem when I was a dust bunny of a kid, barely able to reach the kitchen counter.  It was about my cat.  And it was not profound:

My cat is big and fat.
Can you imagine that?
It likes to purr
And lick its fur.
I wonder why it does that?

Epic.  And sad, because here I am, 20-something years later, still writing about furry animals.  (But that's a digression I can't, in pursuit of avoiding the "lady with the cats" stereotype for five minutes, make.)  But honestly, my first love was poetry.  I used to fill notebooks with sonnets and I wrote couplets on napkins.  I wrote about my middle school political leanings (I know.  It was a little weird.)  I wrote about the environment.  I wrote about falling in love with that boy who say behind me in 5th grade and stole my pencil box.  I actually used a feather pen at one point because I thought that's what "real writers" used.  And I wanted so badly to be a real writer.

Poetry gave way to fiction (Now I'm really letting my inner-nerd out:  Did anyone else read those DragonLance novels and wish they had a Tanis Half-Elven to tuck them in at night?  No?  Just me?), and the fiction I wrote in high school hit a serious range, too.  I did the "young adult romance" stuff, but it was really just me writing about what I wish my high school boyfriend would have said to me.  And I did the "fantasy fiction" stuff based on my aforementioned obsession with Mr. Half-Elven. 

But despite all this angsty, elvish, tree-hugging writing, I always ended up defaulting to humor writing.  My mom always liked Erma Bombeck and she would buy me the anthologies.  I thought Erma was pretty entertaining.  And then I found Dave Barry (I know - you might be rolling your eyes but he had a "back up dog" named Zippy, which made me laugh every time), and then I found Bill Bryson, who had a subtler sense of humor but is exceedingly clever and makes me want to smith up some words.

And then:  David Sedaris.

I think I'd like to be a humorist. I like to make people laugh, and I like allowing my pen to write the thoughts that are really colliding around in my head.  And writing about mumble mumble can be distressing at times, so letting myself laugh at it all, and at just about everything else, helps me live a more balanced existance.  Besides, some stuff is just too funny to not laugh at.

I would just like to laugh for a while. 

And that's what I'm thinking about on this day of not talking about mumble mumble, my second-to-last-day at work, and two days before I embark on a whole new mess of adventures in my life. 

(For more d-bloggers who aren't d-blogging today, follow the #nodday hashtag on Twitter!) 


Oh my gosh, I had one of those feather pens too. It was pink and it had it's own stand and I loved it!! I also had forgotten that I wrote several poems for our high school literary magazine, including one that won for Best Poem that year.

Also, as I leave this comment, I have a cat crawling across my chest and sticking her butt in my face. Scary how similar you and I are sometimes, huh?

Kerri, you already ARE a humorist, and a realist, and a terrific writer.
And I don't think you are a crazy cat lady.......yet

Wow, yes, I read all the DragonLance (well, the first 6, anyway) along with tons of other fantasy. (Geek power!) And all your humorists. And I wrote poems starting in second grade - my specialty (which still impresses my kids) is being able to instantly mock any given poem or song with any assigned topic: "Moon over Bourbon St" to "Cats on the Windowseat", etc, etc.

Been reading mostly mysteries lately as my escape - occasionally fantasies if one of my favorite authors has something new.

One of my earliest memories of you is those Young Authors competitions in 3rd grade or so - I've always remembered you as a writer! Granted my other memory of those Young Authors Days was us using it as an excuse to wear makeup. I so wish I had a picture of that since I'm sure I looked like a 10 year old drag queen gone bad...

You really let your inner self out today. Thanks for sharing. By the way, what's a "couplet?"

David Sedaris?! Why haven't we talked about this before? I LOVE HIM!!

I loaned "When You Are Engulfed In Flames" to one of my coworkers and he read it on a flight, which is all kinds of embarassing because you end up randomly laughing and the people around you start to worry. Believe me - I've been there!

I agree with NJsoozie, you definitely ARE a humorist, Kerri.

David Sedaris rocks! As does Bill Bryson. "In a Sunburnt Country" is one of my all-time favs, although it scared the heck out of me when I read it before going to Austalia. He kept saying that everything in Australia is made to kill you, but luckily, I survived (despite driving an RV down a mountain, on the wrong side of the road, with no guardrail). :-)

I agree with above ... you are a humorist...make me smile with your writings all the time!

I'm very encouraged by you & your mom to continue to help my daughter with her writing...she's only 10 but loves it so much...her stories, poetry...I'm not much of a writer & find it difficult...Thanks Kerri!

It's comforting to know that you are teh "crazy cat lady" I know quie of few of you girls. LOL

Great blog and it made me think of a bunch of notebooks I have that I used to write poetry and songs. I have never been able to spell but I did like to wite. With my eyesight I never really gave it any real thought.

Hope your move is going good and look forward to hearing about the next weeks.

I wish you well


Count me in as a BIG David Sedaris fan. My Dad used to ready Dave Barry's Sunday column to us each week when I was a kid, so I have soft spot for him too. :)

Though, I have to find it very ironic (in a humorist way) that the day of "No D" is the day that my pump won't let me forget about it. It's been having every kind of error message possible as an excuse to chime and buzz at me. I don't think it's left me alone for an entire hour and I'm pretty sure everyone in my office has heard it go off - multiple times. ARGH!!

I hope you'll find more opportunities to write once you've unpacked.

You're more than your illness. If you forget that, you might very well be owned by it...when you should own D. :)

I love fiction. I love happy endings. I read and write romance. I love to cook, and put together jigsaw puzzles. Though my four kids keep me busy, I'm very laidback. Life is too wonderful to fret over. :)

Enjoy a day for yourself. And write something...fun, thoughtful, wild! If you want to laugh, pick up the book Nobody's Baby but Mine... or, Hissy Fit. Well, that's what I would do. :D

dear lord... the books of poems from Mrs. Lamb's class.

I found my nicely (*cough*) bound book in my parents' basement a few weeks ago. All of mine follow a similar pattern to yours, meaning I was apparently into plagiarism at quite a young age.

and colleen - I can totally picture you all done up :P I wonder if I have a picture lying around somewhere...

You would be a great author of children or young adult books. Kids would love you just as much as we do.

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